Can you move like me?

Woh.... Wah... Oohhh... Uhhh... These are the sounds that flood the concert hall last Friday when the famous dancer "Na Na Bally" shows off her skills - utilizing all her muscles to create this dance.



Even the camera man was drooling, wondering if those tiny muscle movements can be utilized in other activities.


Reporting from the Drool Center, Thir Tee Man

The Hunt for Consumerism

Many gathered at the Belly Dancing Restaurant yesterday afternoon. This is the result of free food and beverages offered to all who turned up. It is a marketing event, for electronic products from various vendors.

Prizes were also up for grab, include the very well known "iPhone" offered by Apple Inc. Other prizes included "Playstation Portable", "iPods", Webcams etc.

The turn-out was mixed with many races including Chinese, Caucasians and Indians alike. All wanting a piece of the prize-pie.

The organizers said the event was a success and will have more such events in the future.

Dead Terrorist

The new APNN2

Dear readers,

The Asia Pacific News Network has changed URL as you may have noticed. The 2 signifies new changes to our editorial columns. We want to be innovative and write articles that YOU want to read. So please give us feedback.

Do you want to see more TV serie reviews? Movie reviews? How about Entertainment news or Crime reports? Or do you want to hear about life events or Sport news? Some classified Ads/Commercials or financial news? Of course APNN will report in it's fictitious and comical style. Your support greatly appreciated. YouTube selections will also be featured from time to time.

Wo Ai Ni
CEO (Chief Entertainment Officer)

Thank you for your Support

Dearest readers of the Asia Pacific News Network,

The readership of this blog has been steadily increasing, based on the statistics gathered (see below):

Since the debut of this blog, the average hit rates is about 80(impressions) a day, noting that weekends tend to be the low traffic time. Of course, this number does not tell us if there were really 80 people reading the blog a day - it is more likely the same people hit the blog several times throughout the day. It also shows that on the average, 2 people will read some of the advertising that is on the site.

We want to make the blog better, so we welcome suggestions or articles that are important or interesting to you. Please write your comments by clicking on the comment icon below.

So from now on, APNN URL has been changed to http://apnn2.blogspot.com

Thank you
Wo Ai Ni
one of the bloggers

The Toilet Roll

Did You Commit This Most Appropriate Gruesome Crime? - A weekly series

"Death By the Toilet Flash, Accident or Murder?"

The hot tropical sun was beating mercilessly upon the bald patch of S.M. Lake's head. Dredged in his own perspiration and feeling sticky under his armpits, Lake quickly dashed across the road to the nearest coffee shop and gratefully plopped himself under a fan. Relieved at last and away from the scorching noon sun.

The coffee shop lady hobbled towards Lake, ‘Drink what?’

Lake looked up, ‘Coke.’ The lady strolled lazily back to the counter and shouted his order.

At first, Lake didn’t noticed it but soon he realized that the coffee shop was quite empty. Normally, the place would be crowded with the lunch crowd but today, there were plenty of empty seats. Lake looked at his watch, it was 12.30pm.

The coffee shop lady returned with the Coke, ‘$1.20’

Lake paid. ‘How come no people today?’

‘You didn’t know?’

‘Know what?’

‘That the company opposite, one of the managers died, so they said everybody has to stay in the canteen, police now investigating.'

'So the whole company cannot leave'?

'Ya, everyone is a suspect because everyone hates the Sa Kar manager, they very happy he die you know. They all happy eating pau, drinking kopi, like celebrating.'

‘Really? When?’

‘This morning about 10 o’clock, they said he died in the toilet.’

‘He collapsed?’

‘I don’t know lah but this morning, a lot of people drinking coffee here say he is a bad manager, deserved to die that way.’

‘What way?’

‘Actually quite scary, they said his head got stucked in the toilet bowl. When they pulled out his head, his mouth was ‘why’ to one side. The mouth screwed to one side because he likes to talk and carry tales about people to his manager.'

‘Aiyo! Stuck in the toilet bowl? What was he putting his head in the toilet bowl for?’

‘How I know, but just now the people say, that manager like to Sa Kar big shot and he was actually trying to examine the toilet bowl because his big manager complained the toilet not so clean.’

‘He can call the cleaners for that, why need to go do it himself?’

‘That’s why lor, the people say, actually the Ang Mo manager just mentioned only but this Sa Kar always like to carry his balls, so he go do it himself. Served him right lah.’

‘But how did his head gone stuck?’

‘You think company got only 1 Sa Kar meh. The people all say there must be another Sa Kar who also heard what the Ang Mo manager say. So must have told the cleaning department to do automatic flush. This Sa Kar suay lah, put his head inside the bowl, the toilet automatically flashed, his head kena sucked in so die lah!’

The coffee shop lady grinned, ‘Aiyo, I cannot chit chat now, my boss calling me.’

Lake downed his Coke and thought of the story. Very interesting death under very unusual circumstances. He finished the last drop of the iced Coke and headed across towards the company, he now has the title for his book, 'The Toilet Flash Murder Mystery.'

Now, who could be the smart Sa Kar that got rid of the dumb Sa Kar?

What's your take? Send in your comments. Clue for the week: Muffins


Reporting from APNN Corporate Crime Division (Tomorrow Sure Die)